Yesterday, my hubby kicked off our Modern Family series, and he tackled the issue of dysfunction in our families with candor and humor. If your family struggles with relationships, conflict, bad behaviors, or blame, welcome to life. Every family does. Every single one, including mine. Because my husband and I Pastor a church, some people might think our lives are relatively perfect. Well, let me dispel that notion right now. We’re dysfunctional just like everyone else. All of us think that because we deal with relational issues, we don’t have “normal” lives. But, dysfunction isn’t deviating from the norm. Dysfunction is deviating from God’s best. Any time we choose our way rather than God’s way, we create dysfunction in our families. But, we don’t see it that way, at all. Instead, we’ve been trained to view our dysfunction as something other than sin.
You see, in our modern society, we tend to label our sin by calling it a disorder, blaming the way in which we were raised, or assuming it’s just our personality. Do some people deal with extenuating circumstances? Absolutely. But, for most of us, dysfunction is simply a result of our own poor choices. And, according to 1 John 1:9-10, unless and until we are willing to own up to our sin and admit our wrongs, we aren’t candidates for God’s forgiveness.
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and His Word has no place in our lives.”
In other words, we have to call a spade a spade. Sin is sin. Nothing else. Anything outside of God’s best (Scripture) is dysfunctional. That’ll slap you in the face, won’t it? Changing the way we think about our own dysfunction is critical to correcting our problems.
Check this out:
If dysfunction is created by deviating from God’s best, then function is restored when we own up to our sin and step up to lead our family back to God’s best plan.
Maybe we need to stop focusing on what has happened, and start focusing on what can be. God is waiting with arms wide open.